Tuesday, June 29, 2010

haha i dont know why i on my blogger for today . nothing to blog anw .
nvm i just crap here! since someone say about me ! haha =) thanks anw , you are the best ! serious . yesterday i mass sent those messages to all JC students, and i am sorry if i left you out, if i did i am real sorry , and you can try tell me that i miss you out=)
i didnt listen to emo songs today and is super high today . till like i say hi to almost everyone=)=) today's lecture lucky didnt not make me sleep sia . orelse i die le =.= cause it was Organisational Behaviour , and is damn difficult for me to catch up.
woke up today with my left hand being sore and in pain ar . damn pain la . but still i was nearly but not late for my BCS test . HENG sia ! i did the test expecting everyone to be better than me cause i did not study and is always among the lousiest in my class, but to my surprise , i got 13.5/15 wow! shocking haha!
alrights.. thats all. sometimes i just kinda miss you but .. i was just too late , i rather we meet first and i may get a better chance to know you , but still this is fate . i will still always be there for you even in your highs and in your lows . when you need me just say out and i will be there righ away=)
i wont give up on you and eerything. i will preserve till the end, but when i run low of energy could you just slow down ... haha for yanjuan she will =).
Reflection:"Keep Looking Forward, Dont turn back even if i fell down, cause i will always be right behind you, surpporting you. " I promise !! =)
Walked with you @
10:52 PM
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Monday, June 28, 2010

And for my last part! thanks mei! for always! ok most of the time being there for me ! =) goodluck for your exam! and JASPER! too=) TC!
Walked with you @
11:26 PM
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Tomorrow going to have excel test and i today still go play rugby !!! now my both arms are in pain ar . stupid stupid stupid!!!! haha omg its damn difficult to even type out in blog la . my arms are like so cui!! .sian TTM! hmmm .. alrights! this week hope that there wont be troubles =) one week can le . i already got so many troubles for the past 1 month ... maybe more.. haha but its alright . use to it le . i dont know why i get the feeling of being used =.=
this few weeks has been busy sorting out things . finally . i have given up . i know i wont stand a chance . yeah! victory! kinda surprise when yanjuan msg me and oh shit i forget to msg her tell her goodluck! piang wat a brother i am to her . sometimes people dont realise that everyone dont like him but still carry on doing suffs we dont like .
Anw i skip lecture ! felt bad but still who cares! haha! =) gotta catch up soon ! today damn epic for me ar . some stupid people with no brains security guard keep KP me sia ! wtf! i dont smoke la idoit ! i got asthma how smoke?! wtf sia . damn brainless la ! with people smoking does not mean i smoke k! fucker! fuck off safra! .
alrights i think thats all for today! gotta sleep early and wake up early tomorrow! =)
Reflects: " you are my pillar of strength , so dont fall even if i fall first, Promise me"
Walked with you @
11:17 PM
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Monday, June 21, 2010

Nowadays rainbow looks black to me .i dont know why . somethings just dont go my way . People mistaken me , people take me out as their vending anger person, not happy just scold me , like i no feelings like that. not trying to act pitiful and need your concern . i just need people to understand and appreciate wat i have done for them and not wat i have not done for them. Maybe a few more years later , i cannot tahan go jump building . haha kidding .
Seeing other people leading such lifes and not appreciating their lifes . they are just plain idiots . i wish i would have their lifes . lifes of people acknowledging you in their lifes and not like mine , unappreciated , and things not going my way . so it is me after all?
hiax~ so long nv blog le and thats wat i say . haha damn emo la.
Yesterday did not have a pleasant day working at Hereen's Waraku. the ast.manager keep kp me and roy . even worse than linda sia . then its like i only one attending the customer then say i slow . wtf you serve la . dont wan help there talk cock . nvm . adults nv understands me . even my home also has one pyshcopath . guy somemore
then have monopause .or watever it is spelled . keep venting anger on me . guy somemore . keep having mood swings . i am in this house to for your sake fucker. i am here because my mother told me to be here . if can i would rather stay at my own HOME . If i really cant tahan anymore . i will punch you and walk out of the door nv to go back agian . the most i sleep in playground la .
stop! stop! . i dont know wats wrong with me too . i really damn restless la . cant even talk . damn lazy to talk . damn tired to bother about everything . suddenly i feel like having accident . forget everything about you , me , my uncle . i only want to rmb my father mother sister and my two grandma-s . the rest i can dont rmb . i only want to rmb good things , things that are happy , like 4C and 2B and one more person . the rest are shit .
feeling quite useless now . i dont know why but i just feel it . maybe its time i take a rest from my life , recharge first then come back agian
Walked with you @
10:39 PM
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Thursday, June 10, 2010

Sudden urge to go to the beach and just forget everything . I wanna be back myself agian , i want to , i really really want to . i wanna walk alone at the beach . only me . myself . i wanna think about myself for now .
When can i be myself agian?? one more week k? one more week.
Blog is the only place where i can talk as i like , when i like and how i feel . lucky no one sees this , ok a little people see this.
where is this cheerful zijie gone to ?now always put fake smiles across like that . so easy , deep down it hurts alot . i am not trying to blend in , i am tired of blending in . memories is a nice word , but there are good and bad . i have more of the bad ones .
Does everything bad happens to me . why? i dont blame others , i blame my fate . haha so sad . thats why i need fake smiles . so fake that they seem to be real .
STOP! ok . finish le .
now my projects seems to be endless sia =.= farktard . gonna do a few tomorrow and on saturday and sunday . till then i will be standing there waiting . and waiting . .
alrights . done crapping le . goodnight
Walked with you @
12:34 AM
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Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Suddenly i feel that the world is so big. but i am cramped in my own space. Stupid emo songs stole away my happy face!!
Today was very fun and quite "exciting" ar . haha! ok la ! i am alrights. tmr going to TAMPINES to watch movie.
Believe it or not i went to swensen's ice-cream buffet for three times. YAY! and yes i scare of ice-cream now! sibei sian sia. and i didnt know got rugby trainig on monday! no one tell me till kewen told me when i saw him working sia . =.= FARK!
i want training . freaking sad that my laptop is spoiled=( totally!
Zijie! keep on going! you can de! Dont give up la! k? jiayous! .
this words keep flashing before my eyes . dont know why. just that .... haha nvm=)
today machiam walk around orchard with a crazy girl! . yes she call herself crazy ! not me la!. i very kind one! i call her go hougang chalet only! haha!.
alrights la . i know wat i suppose to be doing . goodbye to you.
going sleep soon! and nothing to say haha! good night Blog!
Walked with you @
12:14 AM
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Sunday, June 6, 2010

Sunday .... yeah . havent lose track of time . feeling down , no mood and no appetite . 2 days le . affected badly by that incident . i dont know why i am affected though . am i ok ? mentally sound? shut up .
feel like disappear for a few days . should not have online today . feeling of bottling up those sadness is very hard . nvm i dont need you . i need time alone . things are going agianst me now .
alright. stop!
FRIDAY
wake up early brush teeth and went off to east coast . played soccer with some friends which cause my hips to be in pain and having injuries to my legs . BOTH! .after that went prawn-ing . (waste money agian) but still continued . went home and took a shower . after that something happened . cause me to feel down and out .
SATURDAY
went out to buy clothes . and yeah it sucks . having those stupid feelings .
SUNDAY
worst day of this month . discovered something so sudden and is a shock to me . now . dont know wat to do.
tomorrow will be working . dont know how i can face people with no smile . joke face ....
This sucks ....
Walked with you @
10:10 PM
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