Saturday, October 23, 2010
Damn today. not good not good. i am just tired of nonsense, arrogance, fighting, Kp-ing and blaming others. stop blaming people. when all has been done. Just freaking accept it, face it and solve it together. instead of just blaming people. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH
Alrights today is 23th of oct which means that in about a few more hours, i will being going to expo to attend the Kpop night concert. Oh man, its gonna be packed. but luckily we are getting sitted. yeah.
i found out that my timetable was very cool. little things and i am also in trouble when i found out that i dont have any CDS. damn. i need to go school early on monday just to talk to my CP about this things. why cant they just put me in some CDS when they say its complusory. its a freaking waste of my time.
i guess i am starting to miss school but the timetable really turns me off. darn it.
Ok i guess its time for me to sleep alr.
Walked with you @
2:05 AM
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Monday, October 18, 2010
I am damn tired today. kinda got woken up thrice today. as always . the only time i get to sleep peacefully is when i am at my own home. my own home is very peaceful and quiet. when i wake up i see sea! and coney island. its damn cool. the morning mist is really really nice. when its raining it is very cooling.
This few days, things around me seems to changed dractiscally. i seem to be losing things, quite, no very fast. I am tired of nonsense, comparing, complaining, listening, Being called upon like some slave and tired of people wanting to challenge me. i dont like this. stop comparing me or challenging me. If you think you are the best, then alright you are the best. tell me for wat? i dont wanna know such shits. and stuffs. I am tired of crapping with you all. really really tired. i wanna cut off all connections with the world.
I guess i really needs some time out. I need some where i can be alone, some where where there is no complaining .
so this is how the real world is like.
I know why i always feels left out. thats because, everyone has a friend whom they can talk to . but my friends are always busy, my parents are always busy. my friends are always others friends. i seem so left out. i am always left out of conversations. Maybe its just that you all are so high up but i am so low down there. I guess i would not be able to reach you all de standards.
so this is how aquarius people is like, low self-esteem. When i am not cut out to be like that, i try my very best to be at there. althought i dont very much like F&B line. i do my best to learn so as to help my father in future. I dont wanna see my mother or father at their old age, having to raise me this kind of a useless son. My father also dont have a very strong heart, so i really really wanna grow up real fast to help him manage his business help him think help him in everyways i can. As for my mother, i really wanna help her . i wan her to have her rest after all this years. i wan her to go around the world with my father to look around. my mother doesnt even step out of the house to go shopping because of me and my sisters. She is afraid. so i must really grow up and learn .
Actually my real dream is to become a pilot. i wanna travel around the world looking at diff things. but that has to be shelved =) . so i hope i will be able to in the future.
Alrights. thats all i guess. see you .
Walked with you @
11:47 PM
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163 posts. hmmm cool. man, rotting at home and really really wanna go school soon. i wan school and i cant believe that i wan school =.- i wanna eat at mensa or design school agian. i miss the food! i miss my friends i miss everything! damn. haha ok!
anw today's soccer was rather awkwarded, my leg was in pain but i just continue. after all this i guess tonight i going to have cramps till i dont know how to cope.
Oh man, i am missing something, someone, somehow.
Kinda feel unappreciated this few days, but well thats life. i guess. ha. hmmm i just cant figure out what are you thinking, cant ur mind be more simple? just let me guess it correctly for once.
getting touchy lately. i cant seem to find out the reason, i get angry over small matters, retarded things and of course retarded people. When you lose something, you gain one thing, i guess for me is , you lose something, you lose more. cant seem to have any appreciations from people nowadays, comeon singaporeans, show some appreaciations.
This feeling of friends who were once close to you leaves you alone after they find no benefits but friends are not for benefits, they are there to help you grow, and learn from mistakes . so in life you have lots of funny , werid people who are your friends, they help you learn from mistakes.
Kinda weird to be my friend because, i am weird. i dont like challenges, maybe its because i am scare of losing . or most probably i find challenges boring.
ok. enough crapping i guess. thats all.
( Sometime, its just good to be selfish for awhile. )
Walked with you @
12:19 AM
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Monday, October 11, 2010
What if. so many many what ifs!!! what if i tell you i miss you? what if i tell you i like you? what if! its oly what if, because, i wont be saying it out to you anyway=)
Holiday is really draining me of my energy and life. suddenly i feel so weak and bored and tired of everything. should start to go out and have fun already. but there is no one to pei me =( . i am damn sian at home now. jio me OUT! .
Gotta work on my cheesecake's appearance, the taste still abit off . haha.
Suddenly i really like swimming alot, swimming and holding ur breath under water opening ur eyes looking forward seeing only blurry visions. It just looks like life, no one knows what is ahead, it is all blurred and could only be seen when it is very near to you. so cool. being under water also let me rethink about all those things that has been happening around me , kinda sad, kinda happy , kinda weird haha.
I dont know why i keep saying wrong things this few days , gotta control my mouth abit. haha! I miss my MEI MEI, YANJUAN! damn sad i not able to attend both of those outings. Promises cant be broken i guess .
Alrights i guess thats all for today =) lets go ECP TOMORROW!
Thoughts: currently still missing you ! damn! haha! XD .TCARE!
Walked with you @
12:29 AM
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Friday, October 8, 2010
I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY I AM SORRY
This few words keep flashing before me and said by me this week. i dont know how often i have used this word already.
Great. now i guess i am in that ..... thing le. SIAN SIA! why ! why must you appear, why must we be so close. WHYYYYYYYYYY. i guess its FORBIDDEN.
ok. nvm . hiax.
things arent going my way , instead its like going agianst me. When i wan this, this dont come out instead that comes out. When you are being critised to a point until you really cant take it, you burst out. something like that keep happening in my house.
OK enough about my life. Tmr going to get my passport, cool but i need to wake up early . WTF~~~ wtf man! . GG la. what is this. somemore i think i wont be able to go eat with 4-CIANS=( damn sad. SUNDAY I AM DAMN FREE. but no one ask me out and i dont think anyone is FREE=(. Cheesecake~~~ i just made some and guess wat the appearance =fail but taste=pass. thats wat junyong said to me today.
I guess i also sprained my ankle, because i went to swim. i dont even know when that happen la. dam patethic sia.
i guess thats all.
i guess i miss you alot, even thought i am not entitled, not suppose and not allowed to even think or miss you. this sucks. When i am just sitting here missing you all day, you are just right there thinking about someone. Cool phrase.
10:57 PM
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